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Category Archives: Funny

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Pheasants

Posted on August 14, 2015 by Nicholas E Jones
Reply

Pheasant farmers need to raise their game.

Posted in Funny | Tagged Humor, Humour, Pheasant | Leave a reply

Rocks

Posted on June 5, 2015 by Nicholas E Jones
2

I’m completely over my fear of touching rocks. 

Well, I’m feeling a little boulder.

Posted in Funny | Tagged Humor, Humour, rocks | 2 Replies

Wasps

Posted on May 10, 2015 by Nicholas E Jones
Reply

The word ‘wasp’ derives from the Latin word ‘vespula germanica’, meaning ‘bum sword’.

Posted in Funny | Tagged Humor, Humour, Wasp | Leave a reply

Ducks

Posted on May 5, 2015 by Nicholas E Jones
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I have named my two mallards Homer and Hesiod, I’m not sure what religion they are but I think they’re Greek author ducks.

Posted in Funny | Tagged ducks, Humor, Humour, mallards | Leave a reply

Dreams

Posted on May 1, 2015 by Nicholas E Jones
Reply

I had a dream last night that I was drowning in a huge seafood chowder. It was really horrible. I woke up all clammy.

Posted in Funny | Tagged dreaming, Humor, Humour, seafood | Leave a reply

Poorly Fish

Posted on April 23, 2015 by Nicholas E Jones
Reply

1. Go to the vets

2. Tell them your fish is poorly

3. Put a fish finger on the examining table

4. Do a sad face

Posted in Funny | Tagged Fish, Humor, Humour | Leave a reply

Piano Tuner

Posted on March 31, 2015 by Nicholas E Jones
Reply

All piano tuners are blind? Just checking, because I have a feeling the one who’s here knows I’m naked. 

52.405233 -1.829304
Posted in Funny | Tagged Humor, Humour, naked, piano, tuner | Leave a reply

Russian Computers

Posted on March 21, 2015 by Nicholas E Jones
Reply

Russian computer: “Enter password”

Me: “Beef stew”

Russian computer: “Password not stroganoff”

52.405347 -1.829408
Posted in Funny | Tagged computers, Humor, Humour | Leave a reply

Benylin

Posted on February 22, 2015 by Nicholas E Jones
Reply

I see the inventor of Benylin has died.
I assume there’ll be no coffin at his funeral.

Posted in Funny | Tagged Humor, Humour | Leave a reply

Star Wars

Posted on January 18, 2015 by Nicholas E Jones
Reply

Which one of the following doesn’t sound like a Star Wars character?

•Darth Vadar
•Obi Wan Kenobi
•Barack Obama
•Boba Fett
•Han Solo
•Dave

Posted in Funny | Tagged Humor, Humour, starwars | Leave a reply

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